Everyone is a salesperson.  Whether you are motivating a team to come up with a solution, asking your employer for a pay rise, or planning a night out with friends, you are trying to influence others with your negotiation and persuasion skills. These skills are crucial in fostering positive connections in both your career and personal life.

These skills have, in fact, been widely applied in sales for decades. Studies show that it is primarily our emotional brain, not our rational brain, that drives our purchasing decisions.  By understanding how these strategies access our emotional brains, you can also subtly guide individuals towards desired outcomes without triggering resistance or skepticism.

1. We like people who are like us

Our brain naturally prefers what is familiar. Skills such as active listening, empathizing with their needs, and asking open-ended questions help to quickly establish common ground. When engaging with someone who is very different from yourself, mirroring their body language and echoing their words are effective ways to build rapport by demonstrating you are ‘just like them’ .

2. Social proof

Human beings want to be liked by their peers. That’s why salespersons present testimonials, customer reviews, or invite KOLs to endorse their products. Next time when you persuade your friends to try a new restaurant, showing them some positive reviews will increase your chance of success.  

3. FOMO (Fear of Missing Out)

Loss aversion is a cognitive bias where the fear associated with potential loss is psychologically more impactful than the satisfaction derived from gains. It is why sales pitches often incorporate limited-time offers, emphasizing the urgency with phrases like ‘when it’s gone, it’s gone’ to spur action. Asking your friend to join you for a workout session at the gym? Instead of highlighting the potential benefits of exercising, how about telling your friend that there are only a few spots left at the gym?

4. Reciprocity

Human beings are social animals. We would feel obliged to return the favours that we have received. That’s why many youtubers would invite you to sign up a free sharing session and give you valuable content before they offer you their masterclass for a fee. Next time you seek to motivate your subordinates to take on more responsibility, consider showing them favours rather than simply commanding them.

5. Anchoring

Customers are shown the original price before being offered a discounted price. It is a classic sales technique called ‘anchoring’ to establish a reference point on perceived value so the customers would recognise they are having a bargain. Next time you consider asking your employer for a pay rise, when you aim for a 10% increment, why not start negotiating at 12%?

6. Mental frameworks

Anchoring is not only about price. It can apply to various aspects of decision-making such as experience perceptions, quality perceptions, product features, etc. which can be better explained as mental frameworks.

Hai Di Lao, the hot pot restaurant that offers free manicure and pedicure to their prospective customers has become as a successful business case. While framing itself as a restaurant, Hai Di Lao had drastically enhanced the perceived value by offering additional high-value services that brings returned customers.

Try framing your offering differently may be a more effective way to get a ‘yes’. If you need to organize a fundraising event for your alumni, why not frame it as a football betting night at a pub where people can bet on different teams and contribute their winnings to fund their alma mater?

Conclusion

Recognizing how our minds are shaping purchase decisions allows us to rediscover the art of persuasion. However, improving our persuasion skill does not equate to being manipulative. Rather, it enables us to magnify our impacts, advocate our beliefs, and to inspire actions for positive changes.